Tuesday, June 16, 2009

Commenting Etiquette

I have an etiquette question and I hope you all can help me.
I believe being a good blogger is about writing interesting posts and commenting on other people's blogs. There are a couple of blogs that I have read for about a year. I comment frequently. But those bloggers never stop by and comment on mine. Nor do they email me and say thanks for stopping by. And I'm not talking about Pioneer Women or people get a thousand comments a post. I know those people don't have time to hit every blog that stops by. I'm talking about average people like me.
I know, wah wah. This is what I have to complain about? Here's my real question. If they aren't "replying" to my comments does that mean they want me to stop commenting on their blog? Keep in mind I'm posting comments that are relevant to topic.
If you think I'm talking about you, I'm not. I know everyone doesn't have time to stop by and comment on every blog so please don't think I'm talking about you.
I treasure every comment I get as well as the personal emails. I try to visit every blog that visits me and comment on their posts. I forget sometimes or can't think of a thing to say.
So what do you think?


  1. Hey! Well, I know where you are coming from, but I am guilty of this too. I actually tried to clean up my "Following" list the other day, because I've signed up to Follow so many dang blogs, that when I log in and try to go thru them all, I have hundreds to sort out. Just fluff ones, and after reading a couple dozen I run out of time or get bored and I know I miss a bunch of actual good blogs.

  2. Hi Linda! I have to agree on this. There are some blogs that I have visited many times and they have never made a comment or stopped by to say a quick "hello". If they're people that have 500 followers and 100 comments on each post, then I can understand.

    I always try to stop by and leave a comment for anyone that has visited my blog. I may have missed a few here and there, but I try to be really good about that. I think of it as common courtesy and being polite.

  3. I try to always respond to people who leave comments on my blog either through a follow up comment or through an email, but I often wonder why people don't do the same to mine. My thing though is I think maybe my comments are worth responding to so I find that I've stopped commenting on some blogs unless I absolutely must speak my mind on something. Although a lot of times I read posts and can't think of anything better than wow great post to write and in those cases, I just refrain from posting.

  4. Hard question, I do notice some blogs I comment on never comment back. Some are sure busy so that is ok, but sometimes I have a feeling that others just don't comment back. I like to go around commenting if I see something nice, and I love if I get comments too. I do treasure them, and I am afraid I might give up on blogs that never takes a look back

  5. It is a tricky question. I guess my thoughts are if I feel I can really contribute something then I'll still comment, but there are some blogs I find myself caring less and less about. When I realize that I haven't clicked over there in about a month or so I just delete them off my GR.

    There are a lot of people who will comment on and off, but it does seem like some other people are more prone to commenting when they want to get attention to something otherwise they just don't do it. Could be a time issue or some people just can be that ego centric and figure their words are worth more than others.

    Just my little 2 cents. Now I'm off to read and probably not comment on lots of blogs because I've been in my weird Introverted funk as of late.

  6. First of all, let me say I'm sorry for not commenting more! I get busy, blah blah. No excuses.

    I do appreciate the comments I get and try to just blanketly thank people via posts or linking back to them.

    I've recently had my comments sent over to my email which helps me to respond more.

    Thanks for reading, following, and commenting on my blog!


  7. Wow, what a great topic and one that I have two cents to put in about...

    I always email back to a commentor when they leave a comment and there's an email attached. The anon ones I sometimes follow up on my comment page but not always. I wish everyone would put an email to their comments!!! I put a lot of time and effort into my blog and when someone takes time out of their day to stop and visit I always make sure that I look them up!!! I think it's just common courtesy, plus building friendships is really fun but yes it takes time. I'm willing to be a constant on a lot of blogs...I enjoy supporting other people and certainly appreciate it when they support my blog.

  8. I often wonder the same thing. I'm so sensitive, and I tend to take it personally. I've also had the experience where I emailed a blogger after she invited readers to express interest in something she was doing, and never heard back. It was hard not to feel like it was a personal affront.

    Anyways, I think I've come to terms with the fact that not everyone has the time to comment, or the interest in doing so...and maybe some place a higher priority on commenting than others? More than anything, I try to remember that there are a handful of people who I do have 2-way bloggy friendships with, and that those relationships are the ones I want to foster...I don't really care to connect with someone who doesn't want to speak to me anyways, right?!

  9. I read your blog and Blablover's blog everyday. Every post. You two post a lot...so sometimes I feel like for me to comment on every post is almost blog harrasement. But that said, I try to visit every blog that comments on mine and comment back. Part of this whole blogging thing is the community we develope.

  10. I totally know what you're talking about. I've ended up just commenting on posts that remind me of something I want to share with the blogger or if they bought something I think is divine.

    I think if you are tired of commenting and not getting responses, just refrain from the comments parts unless its something worth while.

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  12. What I meant to say...

    Interesting topic. I don't usualy reply to the comments on my blog unless they ask a question. But I do comment somewhat regulary on the blogs of those that comment somewhat regularly on mine. I think I have always stopped by and commented on every blog that has left me a comment, even if it's just to say thanks.

  13. I'm really bad about commenting on people's blogs. It's a problem I have in real life too, not just the internet. I'm really antisocial, ergo awkward most of the time, so I feel what I have to say usually ends up sounding awkward, uncomfortable, or sometimes even insulting without me realizing it!

    That being said, I also struggle with wondering if, when someone comments on a blog post of mine, do I comment on my own blog post in reply, or do I go to their blog to reply on one of their posts?

    I mean, I worry if I post a reply comment on my blog, it won't be seen and then someone will think I'm mean. Or if I post a reply on someone's blog in reply to a comment on my blog, will that be uncouth or awkward?

    So, all that aside, I'm sorry I'm not a good commenter. I hope you can forgive me! I do appreciate your comments on my blog!

  14. There seem to be two schools of thought on blogging. Some folks do it because they want to write about something. Some folks do it for popularity. I'm the first kind of blogger. I have been friendly with three people I've chatted with online, but it's not what I set out to do. I don't always post a comment on other blogs because I either don't know what to say or don't have any interest in the topic. I sincerely doubt that a popularity blogger would like a comment such as, "I don't find this interesting." It's not that I don't like comments, I just don't look at them for self-affirmation. Have you thought about why you blog?

    Another example would be those blog awards. I have gotten a few from people. I thank them, but I don't post them on my blog or pass them on. I find them kind of silly. But that's just me.

    If you keep track of blogs in Google Reader, you can read a whole post without actually visiting the blog URL. There are also a few blogs that I follow that take a long time to load properly so I don't visit them often. Today I had to reload your blog twice to be able to read it.

    You frequently post the Weekly Geek and Library Loot stuff. We don't read the same kind of books, so I don't really have anything to contribute there. Perhaps I would learn something new. It's not like I don't enjoy reading you blog. If I didn't I wouldn't follow it. However, it might make some folks feel uncomfortable if you set the tone that they are obligated to comment. There are two possible outcomes there...you lose readers or gain inappropriate comments. Just sayin'.

    The idea of "being a good blogger" is subjective. To me, being a good blogger means posting more frequently than I do to my blogs.

    Absolutely none of this was meant in any way, shape or form to come off as rude. If you knew me, you'd know that's not who I am. I'm not a rude person. I'm often called honest or blunt, but not rude. Regardless, I doubt some commenters here will see it that way. If you don't want honest feedback, don't ask the question. I might not always be sunshine and unicorns, but I'm always an honest person.

  15. I know I know...I suck so bad! I have no excuse. :-(

  16. I don't think that not replying means they want you to stop commenting. Unless you're an abusive blog troll (which I know you aren't), I'm sure they're happy to have your comment. I'm not always good about commenting on other people's sites. Most of the time it's because I'm reading blogs with a two year-old on my lap and it's hard to get a hand free to type a comment. And sometimes it's because comments get all jacked up - i.e., when I click to leave comments here, occasionally it freezes up my browser. (It's not just you, seems to be a glitch between Blogger and Internet Explorer - it always works fine in Firefox.) So that's weird, but there you have it.

  17. I love comments...all comments, as long as they aren't troll-y or abusive in any way.

    I try really hard to remember to leave comments on my favorite blogs, and to respond to comments left on mine, but sometimes I just get busy/distracted. It never means that I don't appreciate the comments! :)

  18. I totally agree.
    It's a sad thing. You're reading, commenting, maybe helping - and nothing comes back... :-(
    I don't understand that, too.

  19. Great discussion, even though I'm late getting to it! I almost always respond to comments on my blog, but often wonder if people stop back to read them. I appreciate the time it takes to comment and feel like a reply is polite. I also try to visit blogs of my commenters, and often leave a comment myself. I think that I may be in the minority on this though.


Shiny! I love comments.